Here's Looking At You Kid. . .

*sigh* where do I start?

Thats exactly the point. We're talking about MICHAEL EFFING JACKSON man! Everyone who knows me, KNOWS im BEYOND a die hard fan. When I heard the new I took it so hard. I've grieved, I've mourned, I've sobbed, I've asked why? Words CANNOT express how I feel. However, if I had to use a metaphor to explain this emptiness in my chest it would be this: It feels like if superman was real and he saved the day all the time, the world looked up to him, children as well as adults of all ages loved him, and then all of a sudden... out of NO WHERE, he dies. My Hero.. My Superman, has passed away. I do not regret shedding a single tear for a man who has had more influence in my life than my father, nor am I going to say "no homo". I'm grown enough and definitely sure enough about my heterosexuality to say I LOVE him. Besides that Superman reference I really can't put my finger on the feeling I'm having right now. Nor the feeling I have now when I listen to "Human Nature". "Dame" Elizabeth Taylor, one of the worlds greatest actresses and MJ's true love, has formed the words I was looking for. God be with her, and I quote:

My heart...my mind...are broken. I loved Michael with all my soul and I
can't imagine life without him. We had so much in common and we had such loving fun
together. I was packing up my clothes to go to London for his opening when I heard
the news. I still can't believe it. I don't want to believe it. It can't be so. He
will live in my heart forever but it's not enough. My life feels so empty. I don't
think anyone knew how muchwe loved each other. The purest most giving love I've ever
known. Oh God! I'm going to miss him. I can't imagine life without him. But I guess
with God's help I'll learn. I keep looking at the photo he gave me of himself which
says, "To my true love Elizabeth, I love you forever." And I will love HIM forever.

Well said Dame Elizabeth, well said.

So for Mikey Ol' Boy,

"Heres to Looking at
you Kid."